xífù: 媳妇 - Wife, Daughter-in-law

• Keywords: xifu, xi fu, 媳妇, wife in Chinese, daughter-in-law in Chinese, Chinese family terms, how to say wife in Mandarin, difference between 媳妇 and 老婆, Chinese culture, marriage terms in Chinese, xifu meaning.
• Summary: The Chinese word 媳妇 (xífù) is a versatile noun that holds two primary meanings: “wife” and “daughter-in-law” (son's wife). While its traditional and universally understood meaning is “daughter-in-law,” it has evolved to become a common and affectionate term for “wife,” particularly in Northern China. Understanding when to use 媳妇 (xífù) depends heavily on regional context and the speaker's relationship to the person, making it a fascinating example of how language reflects cultural family structures.

• Pinyin (with tone marks): xífù
• Part of Speech: Noun
• HSK Level: HSK 4
• Concise Definition: A man's wife or a son's wife (daughter-in-law).
• In a Nutshell: At its heart, 媳妇 (xífù) is about a woman joining a new family through marriage. Its original meaning is “daughter-in-law,” which is still used and understood throughout all of China. However, in many northern regions, it has become a very common, slightly traditional, and endearing way for a man to refer to his own wife. It carries a warmer, more familial tone than the formal 妻子 (qīzi) and is a popular alternative to the more modern 老婆 (lǎopó).

• 媳 (xí): This character is composed of the radical 女 (nǚ), meaning “woman,” and the phonetic component 息 (xī), which means “breath” or “to rest.” Together, they create the image of a woman who has come to join and “rest” in a new family, signifying a daughter-in-law.
• 妇 (fù): This character also contains the “woman” radical 女 (nǚ). The other part is an ancient pictograph of a hand holding a broom (帚). It originally depicted a woman engaged in domestic duties and broadly means “married woman” or “woman.”
• Combined Meaning: The characters 媳 (xí) and 妇 (fù) together reinforce the concept of a married woman's role and identity within her husband's family, hence the dual meaning of “daughter-in-law” and “wife.”

The dual meaning of 媳妇 (xífù) is a direct reflection of traditional Chinese family structure. In a patriarchal and patrilocal society, a woman would marry *into* her husband's family, leaving her own to live with his parents. From the family's perspective, the most important new role she took on was that of the 儿媳 (érxí), or daughter-in-law, responsible for carrying on the family line and caring for her in-laws. For a husband living in this extended family unit, his “wife” and his parents' “daughter-in-law” were the same person. Over time, especially in Northern China, it became natural for the husband to also adopt the term 媳妇 to refer to his wife, blurring the lines between the two roles. This contrasts sharply with Western culture, where the nuclear family is the norm. A man would almost never refer to his wife as his “daughter-in-law,” as those roles are seen as entirely distinct and belonging to different generational relationships (his relationship vs. his parents' relationship). The use of 媳妇 in Chinese highlights a more collectivist view of family, where an individual's identity is deeply intertwined with the larger family unit.

This is a very common usage in Northern China (e.g., Beijing, Dongbei/Northeast China). It is affectionate and used in everyday conversation. A man introducing his wife might proudly say, “这是我媳妇” (This is my wife). It feels a bit more traditional and grounded than the more modern-sounding 老婆 (lǎopó). Using it in Southern China (e.g., Guangzhou, Shanghai) might cause confusion, as people there tend to stick to the “daughter-in-law” meaning.

This is the original and universally understood meaning across all of China. Parents will refer to their son's wife as their 媳妇. This usage is clear and unambiguous, regardless of region. The relationship between a mother-in-law (婆婆, pópo) and her 媳妇 (xífù) is a major theme in Chinese family dramas.

媳妇 (xífù) is generally informal or colloquial. For formal contexts, such as on legal documents, in official speeches, or in writing, the term 妻子 (qīzi) is the appropriate choice.

• Example 1:
  • 我得赶紧回家，我媳妇给我做好饭了。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ děi gǎnjǐn huí jiā, wǒ xífù gěi wǒ zuò hǎo fàn le.
  • English: I have to hurry home, my wife has made dinner for me.
  • Analysis: This is a classic example from a husband's perspective, common in Northern China. It's informal, warm, and conversational.
• Example 2:
  • 我妈总说，她这个媳妇比亲闺女还亲。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ mā zǒng shuō, tā zhège xífù bǐ qīn guīnü hái qīn.
  • English: My mom always says that this daughter-in-law of hers is closer to her than her own daughter.
  • Analysis: Here, 媳妇 clearly means “daughter-in-law.” The speaker is talking about his/her mother's relationship with the son's wife.
• Example 3:
  • 他终于娶媳妇了，我们都为他高兴。
  • Pinyin: Tā zhōngyú qǔ xífù le, wǒmen dōu wèi tā gāoxìng.
  • English: He finally got married (literally: took a wife), we are all happy for him.
  • Analysis: The phrase “娶媳妇 (qǔ xífù)” is a very common set phrase for a man getting married. It literally means “to take a wife/daughter-in-law.”
• Example 4:
  • 你看，这是我儿子和媳妇的照片。
  • Pinyin: Nǐ kàn, zhè shì wǒ érzi hé xífù de zhàopiàn.
  • English: Look, this is a photo of my son and my daughter-in-law.
  • Analysis: A clear-cut example of a parent referring to their son's wife. This usage is understood everywhere in China.
• Example 5:
  • 找个好媳妇可不容易啊！
  • Pinyin: Zhǎo ge hǎo xífù kě bù róngyì a!
  • English: It's really not easy to find a good wife!
  • Analysis: In this context, a young man or his family might use 媳妇 to mean a prospective wife. It implies finding a good partner to bring into the family.
• Example 6:
  • 小王，你媳妇怎么没跟你一起来？
  • Pinyin: Xiǎo Wáng, nǐ xífù zěnme méi gēn nǐ yīqǐ lái?
  • English: Little Wang, why didn't your wife come with you?
  • Analysis: A friendly, informal question asked to a man about his wife. This is very natural in a northern Chinese setting.
• Example 7:
  • 婆媳关系是中国家庭里一个很复杂的问题。
  • Pinyin: Pó-xí guānxì shì Zhōngguó jiātíng lǐ yí ge hěn fùzá de wèntí.
  • English: The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is a very complex issue in Chinese families.
  • Analysis: This example doesn't use the full word but uses the character 媳 (xí) to represent daughter-in-law in the compound word “婆媳 (pó-xí)”, highlighting its core meaning.
• Example 8:
  • 他把他媳妇宠上天了。
  • Pinyin: Tā bǎ tā xífù chǒng shàng tiān le.
  • English: He spoils his wife rotten (literally: pampers his wife to the heavens).
  • Analysis: An informal, vivid description of how a husband treats his wife. Again, this usage is more common in the north.
• Example 9:
  • 我刚过门的媳妇很会做饭。
  • Pinyin: Wǒ gāng guò mén de xífù hěn huì zuòfàn.
  • English: My new daughter-in-law (who just married into the family) is very good at cooking.
  • Analysis: Spoken from a parent-in-law's perspective about a newlywed. “过门 (guò mén)” means to marry into the family, reinforcing the “daughter-in-law” context.
• Example 10:
  • 南方人很少叫自己的妻子为“媳妇”。
  • Pinyin: Nánfāng rén hěn shǎo jiào zìjǐ de qīzi wéi “xífù”.
  • English: People from Southern China rarely call their own wives “xífù”.
  • Analysis: This sentence directly explains the regional nuance, which is a key learning point for this word.

• The Regional Trap: The most common mistake for learners is to use 媳妇 to mean “wife” when speaking with people from Southern China. They will likely understand you from context, but it may sound strange, as if you're talking about your daughter-in-law. When in doubt, use 老婆 (lǎopó) for “wife,” as it is universally understood and used informally.
• Who is Speaking?: Context is king. If a man is talking, 媳妇 could mean his wife. If his parents are talking, it almost certainly means their daughter-in-law. A woman would not typically refer to herself as “我是他的媳妇” (I am his xífù) to mean “I am his wife.” She would say, “我是他老婆 (wǒ shì tā lǎopó)” or “我是他妻子 (wǒ shì tā qīzi).”
• Not a 1-to-1 Translation: Do not think of 媳妇 as a perfect synonym for “wife.” It is one of several options, each with a different flavor:
  • 媳妇 (xífù): Familial, warm, traditional. Regional (Northern).
  • 老婆 (lǎopó): Very common, informal, modern, used everywhere.
  • 妻子 (qīzi): Formal, written, neutral. Used in official contexts.

• 老婆 (lǎopó) - The most common informal term for “wife” throughout China.
• 妻子 (qīzi) - The formal, official, or written term for “wife.”
• 太太 (tàitai) - A polite and slightly more formal term for “wife” or “Mrs.,” often used when referring to another person's wife.
• 老公 (lǎogōng) - The informal counterpart to 老婆; “husband.”
• 丈夫 (zhàngfu) - The formal counterpart to 妻子; “husband.”
• 儿媳 (érxí) - A more specific and unambiguous term for “daughter-in-law.”
• 婆婆 (pópo) - Mother-in-law (the husband's mother). The relationship with the 媳妇 is a key family dynamic.
• 公公 (gōnggong) - Father-in-law (the husband's father).
• 娶媳妇 (qǔ xífù) - A common verb phrase meaning “to get married” for a man, literally “to take a wife.”
• 新媳妇 (xīn xífù) - A newlywed wife or a new daughter-in-law.