When combined, 看得起 (kàn de qǐ) literally means “able to look up at” someone. This physical metaphor perfectly captures the abstract idea of holding someone in high esteem or placing them on a higher social or personal level than oneself.
`看得起` is a term deeply embedded in the social fabric of China, and it reveals a lot about cultural values like hierarchy, face (面子, miànzi), and relationships (关系, guānxi). While Western cultures have the concept of “respect,” `看得起` is different. “Respect” in English can often be a default setting (e.g., “respect your elders” or “respect the law”), implying a baseline level of civility or acknowledgement of authority. `看得起`, however, is almost always an earned judgment. It implies that someone has actively assessed you and found you worthy. For example, a boss who `看得起` you doesn't just respect your position; they value your skills and see your potential. A potential father-in-law who `看得起` his daughter's boyfriend isn't just being polite; he has judged the young man's character, career, and background and given his approval. This makes being “looked down on,” or `看不起 (kànbuqǐ)`, a particularly sharp insult. It’s not just a disagreement; it's a personal and social rejection. The dynamic between `看得起` and `看不起` is a constant undercurrent in workplaces, families, and social circles, reflecting the importance of social validation and not losing face.
This term is frequently used to describe interpersonal dynamics, especially concerning power, status, and ability.
It's crucial in a professional context. An employee craves to be `看得起` by their manager, as this often leads to promotions, better projects, and trust.
“My boss really thinks highly of me; he gave me the entire project.”
`老板很看得起我，把整个项目都交给我了。`
It's often used when discussing approval, especially from elders or peers. A common trope in Chinese dramas involves a character from a humble background striving to be `看得起` by their wealthy partner's family.
“If you don't have a stable job, her parents definitely won't think highly of you.”
`你没有一份稳定的工作，她父母肯定会看不起你的。` (Note the use of the negative form).
While `看得起` is positive, its negative form, `看不起 (kànbuqǐ)`, is arguably used more frequently in everyday conversation. People often complain about being looked down on (“他看不起我” - He looks down on me) or use it as a defiant question (“你看不起我吗？” - Are you looking down on me?). Using the positive form `看得起` can sometimes be a way to express gratitude for being given a chance or a great responsibility. For example, “谢谢你这么看得起我” (Thank you for thinking so highly of me).