In Chinese culture, there is traditionally a higher value placed on emotional restraint and not burdening others with one's personal problems (a concept known as 不想麻烦别人, `bù xiǎng máfan biérén`). This makes the idea of 心事 (xīnshì) particularly significant. A 心事 is often kept private. People might carry it for a long time without speaking about it. Therefore, asking a friend, “你是不是有什么心事？” (Do you have something on your mind?) is a sign of deep trust and intimacy. It's an invitation to share a personal burden, not a casual “What's up?”. This contrasts with Western, particularly American, cultural norms that often encourage “talking it out” immediately. While a Westerner might openly say, “I'm so worried about my job interview,” a Chinese person might keep that anxiety as a 心事, appearing quiet or distracted until a close friend gently inquires. Having a 心事 suggests a state of inner turmoil that isn't for public display.
心事 is a very common word in daily life, especially in personal conversations among friends and family.
A frequent mistake for learners is to use 心事 for any kind of problem. It is crucial to distinguish it from other “problem” words.